​A quality life embraces suffering. Part of doing anything meaningful in life requires sacrifice. Listen to this talk given to a K-12 student body on the importance of believing in suffering. 

This article by Ryan Holiday from 2014 (over 4 years ago!) described the idea of how outrage culture was beginning to define modern media. Fast forward to today and call out culture - a synonym of outrage culture - is in full force.

The strange part about this culture is that it exists almost entirely on the internet. In your day-to-day life and you likely won’t interact with anyone who is violently opposed to your _______ (insert: gender, race, religion, political beliefs or a combo of all of them). Face-to-face we generally act civil to one another and interact with respect, dignity, and courtesy.

Why does it all break down on the internet?

Behind the virtual wall of our devices, we feel much more vocal because of the anonymity. Without the threat of physical repercussions (yelling, counter arguing and not just punching), we feel empowered to say what we think. However, the divide between real and virtual life is big. It appears there’s something else going on here.

It’s the echo chamber of social media.

Since anyone today can claim to be a news outlet, we’re being shown (polite way of saying it) information from politically biased sources. This would normally not be an issue without the internet because we could simply ignore it. However, if we follow a specific person on a social media platform like Twitter and they happen to forward one of these biased articles, we’re starting the trend towards the echo chamber. Us human beings are constantly on the lookout for acceptance and groupthink. It’s helped us stay safe for a long time and is genetically wired into our soul. When we see or hear someone of influence agree with our views it empowers to go forth and spread the word. It must be true, right?

Combatting outrage

There are two ways you can manage to survive in a world filled with outrage. One is to believe it and be as responsible as possible with the information you encounter. If you feel that a specific group is being targeted for some oppression then support the belief with data and evidence. There are plenty of scientific journals that study the interactions of human beings. Use credible research to back-up your viewpoint. Rage is never productive, especially in a debate. Focus on getting to the right answer instead of changing a person’s opinion.

The second is to accept it. The world has never been safer, healthier and happier than today. The trend continues to push us towards utopia. Sure, you may have been dealt a poor hand in the world. Perhaps you have a sick family member or a disability. The good news is that there are many stories of people overcoming these disadvantages and living a healthy and productive life. Western civilization was formed on the tenants of Judeo-Christian values including truth, love, and courage. Part of these ideas is that a truly flourishing life requires sacrifice and hardships. Moving forward in spite of difficulties helps us grow and become the people we want to be.

Regardless of how equitable we can make the world, it will never be perfect. Anyone can find something to be oppressed by. It’s how you deal with it that will make the world move forward or backward.

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​Many of the great leaders in history seemed to have it all together when it mattered most. Churchill, when facing invasion against a superior army in the Germans, stood tall and proclaimed victory instead of defeat. He did so with stoicism, confidence, and courage. This act (which appears simple) not only rallied a nation in a dark time, it forced the Nazi’s to rethink their strategy. 

Although Churchill appeared confident in public, it wasn’t so much the case in private. He often overthought his words when preparing speeches and became frustrated and angry easy when dealing with his friends and family. 

We all have the ability to appear polished like Churchill. But we first must conquer ourselves. Our desires, emotions, and nihilism hold us back from rising to the occasion when needed. It’s not that we must bury these negative traits, but instead have to learn to live with them. When they control us, we become weak and unreliable. 

In the bible St. Matthew writes in chapter 5 verse 5:

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

Here’s what is meant by meek:

The meek.--The word so rendered was probably used by St. Matthew in its popular meaning, without any reference to the definition which ethical writers had given of it, but it may be worthwhile to recall Aristotle's account of it (Eth. Nicom. v. 5) as the character of one who has the passion of resentment under control, and who is, therefore, tranquil and untroubled, as in part determining the popular use of the word, and in part also explaining the beatitude.

It means those who have the dragon but choose not to bring it out will inherit the earth. Like Churchill, you need to manage the demons inside you and move forward anyway. 

Kenyan Eliud Kipchoge set a new world record for men of 2:01:39 on September 16, 2018, at the 2018 Berlin Marathon. It is the closest a human has come to breaking the much sought after sub-2-hour marathon. Much like Roger Bannister’s ‘miracle mile’, most sports scientists believe that it is within human capacity to break this mark at some point. 

It hasn’t always been this way, check out what happened in the marathon at the 1904 Olympics in St. Louis:

The first place finisher did most of the race in a car. He had intended to drop out, and got a car back to the stadium to get his change of clothes, and just kind of started jogging when he heard the fanfare.

The second place finisher was carried across the finish line, legs technically twitching, by his trainers. They had been refusing him water, and giving him a mixture of Brandy and Rat Poison for the entire race. Doping wasn't illegal yet (and this was a terrible attempt at it), so he got the gold when the First guy was revealed.

Third finisher was unremarkable, somehow.

Fourth finisher was a Cuban Mailman, who had raised the funds to attend the olympics by running non-stop around his entire country. He landed in New Orleans, and promptly lost all of the travelling money on a riverboat casino. He ran the race in dress shoes and long trousers (cut off at the knee by a fellow competitor with a knife). He probably would have come in first (well, second, behind the car) had it not been for the hour nap he took on the side of the track after eating rotten apples he found on the side of the race.

9th and 12th finishers were from South Africa, and ran barefoot. South Africa didn't actually send a delegation - these were students who just happened to be in town and thought it sounded fun. 9th was chased a mile off course by angry dogs. Note: These are the first Africans to compete in any modern Olympic event.

Half the participants had never raced competitively before. Some died.
St. Louis only had one water stop on the entire run. This, coupled with the dusty road, and exacerbated by the cars kicking up dust, lead to the above fatalities. And yet, somehow, Rat Poison guy survived to get the Gold.

The Russian delegation arrived a week late, because they were still using the Julian calendar... in 1904.

In just over 100 years we have gone from drinking rat poison during a run to now pushing the limits of the human body. What happened? The obvious answers are correct - the birth and development of sports science, the invention of proper clothing and the increase in the number of people participating in the sport. 

The more underrated answer is the development of the human spirit. It’s true that we’ve been able to survive much tougher conditions throughout our history. However, we’ve needed to rely on mythical stories or hearsay evidence to motivate us to push through our limits. After Bannister broke the 4 min mile, only one other person managed to do it (John Landy) within a year. However, within 25 years hundreds of people had broken the 4 min mile and even today a strong high school runner can do it. 

Knowing that it was possible made a big difference. It’s much easier to chase down dreams when people you can relate to having accomplished them. 

As our world becomes increasingly specialized, we’ll see these kinds of records continue to be broken. Most youth athletes spend a vast majority of their extracurricular activities on just one sport. There is a danger, however, in embarking on such a journey. What are you missing out on by sacrificing it all for one sport/opportunity/dream?
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It’s important to expose yourself to a wide variety of experiences before making the leap to specialize. Once you decide, definitely put all your eggs in one basket. Find someone who you can emulate - even if they’re physically inaccessible. And then get after it! Records are obstacles to be broken!

Martin Luther King, Gandhi, Joan of Arc, Jesus. What do these historic legends have in common? They all did the right thing. And it cost them everything.

We often assume that doing the right thing comes at less of a cost than taking the wrong route. We also wrongly assume that it should be rewarded.

It’s no doubt that this belief is ingrained into our psyche. It’s been part of our lives since we were children. We’re always looking for the easy way to get to the end. Tattle tailing is something kids often use to solve problems. Getting an adult involved alleviates them from extra work to solve their own issues. Of course, we can’t expect children to address problems without first teaching them how to do it. Sometimes it doesn’t happen and the kids turn into adults and use others to solve their problems. The right way is hard.

To be like MLK and Jesus, you need to embrace the difficulty that comes with doing the right thing. Complex problems cannot be solved through Twitter debates. If you can shut your phone off and forget about the problem, you’re likely not invested enough in it.
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If you really want to stop racism and corrupt capitalism, organize debates, protests and campaigns. However, be prepared that it might not work and could cost you everything.

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"This is what you deserve. You could be good today. But instead you choose tomorrow."
- Marcus Aurelius

Most of use spend too much time in the past or the future  instead  of the present.  Procrastination is the ultimate denial of the stoic - to assume that tomorrow will be better than today.  Work never goes away, suffering does not diminish by relegating a task to another time and the sacrifice required to forgo pain for pleasure  will never disappear. 

Eating healthy,  making your bed and doing exercise  are acts that can be done immediately and will not get easier  if you put it off until the next day. 

Ignore the simple but difficult tasks in your life and small  problems become big ones. 

You are what you deserve to be. 

How does one become a social media expert? There   aren't  any phD programs that specialize in mastering social media.  Just like an electrician can only be certified after several hours of on the job training, expertise on almost anything can be established through experience. 

Do social media experts have more experience with social media than the rest of us? 

Doubtful.

It's difficult to be an expert a shoelace tying , bed-making or filling  tanks of gas.  These are things we all need to do and spending time becoming the 'expert' is irrelevant.

Social media experts don't tweet better, hit the like button more efficiently or upload images more effectively than everybody else. Instead, they've created a label that holds no merit. That doesn't mean they are fraudulent, it just means that they've replaced  the scientifically rigorous study of people's interactions in an online environment with an idea that you can become an expert  without the hard work. 

Be wary of smoke and mirrors. If you're someone who is a self-proclaimed expert in anything, be sure that you have the experience, education or   skill set to effectively navigate your craft. 

When you’re walking down a busy street and you see someone drop their phone, do you pick it up and give it back? What about seeing someone with a baby carriage struggle to open a door? Would you help?

Almost all of us would without hesitation, stop and help someone open a door or pick up a fallen item.

The interesting question is: Why do we do it?

Helping a fellow human-being with their daily struggle is an essential quality that has been carefully crafted into us through years of evolution. Being ultra-social beings, we must be able to help and support one another if we’re going to be successful as a society.

Some of us believe that empathy is the driving force behind all of these courteous acts by strangers taking place every day throughout the world. Empathy is the emotional motivator that provides us with a hit of serotonin every time we cooperate or help. Oxytocin is also known as the bonding hormone. Mothers receive huge hits of oxytocin when their baby is born. It provides a euphoric feeling that helps reduce physical pain and increase the bond between her and the baby - which is a good thing because those early days of parenting aren’t easy!

Here’s the trouble with empathy: it’s extremely biased. According to Paul Bloom, we must be very careful not to lead with empathetic feelings because we’ll have a tendency to support those most like us. While this might not seem like a bad idea, Bloom suggests looking at it in greater scope. For example, the Make-A-Wish Foundation spent over $10 000 on turning a terminally ill boy into Batman and parading him around the city in a Batmobile. No doubt it was a very special moment for the boy, his family, and the city. Empathy wins, right?

Maybe. 

What if that money was used to purchase mosquito nets used to prevent the spread of malaria in Africa? Hundreds if not thousands of lives could have been saved. Where is the empathy in that endeavor?
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Instead of leading with empathy, we’re better to use reason and compassion when dealing with people in need. Compassion differs from empathy in that were not mapping the feeling of another individual on our own. Instead, we support and help one another because it’s the right thing to do.

We should pick up the fallen phone because it will make that person’s day better not just because we’d want someone to do it if the rolls are reversed.

It’s a subtle difference but an important one. ​